When Love And Death Embrace

so this is the end.



i am single.
i am still in love.
i am alone.

this is what it means to start over.

i ran out of potential love interests and we all fucked each other over.

he was the boy who claimed a lot of my firsts. but not as many as i would have liked.



now i have not a single boy to pursue me.

when i am lonely, i have no one to talk to.
i have no where to go.
i have no one to kiss.
i have no on to hold.
i have no one to take the rest of my firsts.


i wanted it to be soon.
but i guess that won't be happening.



I am the only one of my friends who is a virgin.
I'm not ashamed of it or whatever. I think it is part of life.

i am upset about being a virgin because I feel like no one has ever wanted me. I never had to stop anyone from moving to fast in a relationship. I would have fucking let you. i would have.

but you didn't. we stopped and drove home.

i wanted you so bad. i still do.

but i know i won't get it.



i am a virgin. i don't want to be a virgin. And I see no way of changing the situation.